The Air I Breathe
by Emmett Princess
Summary: Paul imprinted on Rachel before she went to college but Sam and Jake both ordered him to stay away from her.  What happens when Rachel's life is put on the line?  Will Paul tell her the truth and go against Alpha orders?
1. Chapter 1

_1: Rescue Me_

BILLY POV

I was sitting in the kitchen reading the paper when the phone broke the silence that had surrounded me for several hours. I glanced at the clock on the stove. It was 11:30 pm which meant only one thing to me. My best friend and chief of police in the next town had locked himself out of his house again. Wheeling myself over to the phone I quickly realize I was very wrong about this call, it was a hospital in Los Angeles where my oldest daughter Rachel lived.

Slowly I pressed the talk button on the handset lifting it to my ear. After taking a deep breath trying to slow my heart rate down a bit I said "Hello?" I heard my voice already giving out and panic setting in. I didn't want to think the worst but it was too late I knew in my heart there was something wrong with my little girl. For a second I closed my eyes saying a small prayer as I waited for a response on the other end.

After what seemed like hours I heard a woman on the other end of the phone. Her voice was low almost too low for me to hear her. "Is this William Black?" she asked in a blank tone. I knew at that very moment what was about to happen and I hated the feeling eating at my gut. The woman didn't wait for me to give her an answer before she spoke again. "My name is Heather and I work at the Ronald Regan UCLA Medical Center. We have a young woman here by the name of Rachel Danielle Black and it says in her medical records that you are her emergency contact," she murmured softly.

My heart sank in my chest and my hands began to shake as I got up the courage to speak. "Yes, I'm Rachel's father," I said dreading the question I was about to ask. "Is Rachel alright?" I already knew the answer but I prayed that I was wrong. I was very rarely wrong but in this case I wanted nothing more than to be dead wrong.

Heather's voice seemed to become louder as my panic set in further. "You'll need to come out here as soon as possible. Your daughter has been brought in the emergency room and she appears to have been severely beaten. Please get here as soon as you can, she is asking for you," she said before hanging up the phone.

The words were spinning in my head as I tried to call my best friend Charlie. My little girl was lying in a hospital bed in Los Angeles and I was miles away. Charlie didn't answer his phone so I was stuck leaving him a message. "Charlie, Rachel has been hurt pretty bad I need to get out to LA as soon as possible," I rambled out ending the call without saying goodbye.

I heard a car pull into the driveway slowly almost as if they were lost. Charlie came through the front door and I nearly fell apart just looking at him. Charlie walked over to me placing his hand on my shoulder. "Let's get going, I booked us a flight out to Los Angeles. It leaves in an hour and a half so we'd better leave now," he told me worriedly.

The next thing I had to do was tell Jacob, my only son, my youngest child that his sister had been hurt. I swallowed hard trying to find the words to tell him as I rolled into his room. Jake spotted me right away and I froze looking everywhere but into his eyes. "Jake, we need to talk," I choked out desperately trying to hold myself together.

The room fell silent, so much so that you could hear a pin drop. "Dad, what is it?" Jacob asked. His eyes never broke contact with mine as he stood up and walked toward me. "The last time you had that tone in your voice, you were telling me that Mom was dead."

Everything in the room around me seemed to blur as Jacob's words rang through my ears. It felt as if someone had just stabbed me in the chest with a double edged sword. "I know, Jake, but I have something I need to tell you," I stammered desperate for help.

Charlie walked in the room in that moment like he was reading my mind. "Jake, it's Rachel, she's been hurt pretty bad and I need to fly out to Los Angeles with your dad to check on her," he said placing a strong arm on Jake's shoulder. "Do you want to go with us to see Rachel, Jacob?"

Jacob shook his head slowly not looking at me or Charlie when he spoke. "No, I think I should stay here besides someone has to tell Paul," he said staring out the window. Jake turned to me obliviously fighting back his emotions. "Dad, can you do me a favor please?"

Pushing my chair over to Jacob, I reached for his arm trying to relax him. "You can ask me for anything, Jake you know that," I whispered softly hoping that it would help. "Whatever it is Jake, I'll do it for you." I was desperately trying to break the silence I felt once I stopped talking but knowing that Jacob was upset didn't help matters any.

Jacob looked at Charlie and I with tear glistened eyes. "Can you tell Rachel that I love her and that I'll be waiting for her to come home?" Jacob's voice was broken with every word he said but I knew he genuinely meant everything. As I turned to leave I heard Jacob's voice again. "I just can't lose her too!" he said breaking down into tears.

I wanted to comfort Jacob desperately but I had to catch a plane before it got any later so I did what any worried parent would, I called Charlie's daughter Bella to help. The phone rang twice before Bella picked up. I rambled out what was going on before she even had a chance to say hello. A few minutes later Bella was on my way to my house without asking any questions. All I could say to her was for her to take care of Jacob for me.

The flight to Los Angeles seemed so long I was gripping the plane seat harder than I should have. My knuckles were white and sweat was beading down my face I hadn't felt this nervous since my wife Sarah passed away. Charlie placed a comforting hand on my shoulder and took a deep breath. "She'll be all right Billy she is a Black after all," he told me sounding like he had to convince himself of that as well.

The next few hours of the flight were a blur I just remember Charlie saying that we have landed and we should be at the hospital in a few minutes. My heart was pounding in my chest so loudly I could hear it in my ears. I didn't know what to think or feel I had gone completely numb. We walked into the hospital and nurses and doctors swarmed me. They were asking so many questions I couldn't keep up with the answers. My mind flashed back to when Sarah had her car accident I didn't know what to do but all I wanted was to see my daughter.

A tall dark haired doctor met Charlie and I in the waiting room with a chart in his hand. He looked a lot like Dr. Cullen back in Forks and somehow I almost wished that he was. He took his seat beside Charlie. "Mr. Black?" he asked extending his hand to meet mine. "I'm Dr. Paisley I've been the one overseeing your daughter's care," he told me flatly.

The tone in his voice seemed to bother Charlie but I had just assumed that he was exhausted just like we were. "Is my daughter all right?" I asked not really wanting specifics of her case at the moment. "I just want to know if my baby girl is all right," I said hoping he would answer my previous question before I answered any of his.

Dr. Paisley smiled briefly and looked down at his chart. "Rachel appears to have been badly beaten. The damage is not irreversible but she does have a long road of recovery ahead of her. She keeps asking for someone named Paul, does not name mean anything to you?" he asked quietly.

I nodded once and tried to keep my cool. "Yes, Paul Damon is her best friend he lives back in La Push, Washington with me," I told him before turning to Charlie. "We'd like to see Rachel now if that's all right." I knew my tone was probably not at the best right now but I wanted to see Rachel and worry about the details later.

With a nod Dr. Paisley led us into a small room with white walls and white curtains. The sound of beeping machines bounced off the walls. The nurse pulled back the curtain surrounding the bed and there she was. My daughter was black and blue everywhere I could see and they had her on oxygen to help her breathe. The nurse smiled at me and took a minute before she spoke to Charlie.

Charlie and the nurse left the room to give me some time with Rachel. Her eyes were closed and her black hair seemed damp as if she had just gotten out of the shower. I hated this I hated every second of it I wanted her to open her eyes and tell me what happened. "Rachel if you can hear me open your eyes sweetie," I pleaded squeezing her hand.

When the nurse came back with Charlie I was still holding onto Rachel's hand for dear life. Charlie squeezed my shoulder looking down at Rachel. "Do you want the details, Billy or would you rather just sit here?" he asked. Without an answer Charlie began to tell me little bits and pieces of what went on. "The nurse said that she wakes up every few minutes screaming for Paul like her life depended on it. Jamie asked if we knew how to reach Paul," he muttered softly.

I turned my head to look at Charlie. "Who is Jamie? As for reaching Paul, let Jake handle that please," I whispered not wanting to disturb Rachel. I looked down when I felt someone squeeze my hand to see my beautiful daughter staring at me. Tears of relief streamed down my cheeks and I was unable to speak.

Rachel glanced at the Charlie and half smiled. "Hi Uncle Charlie where's my Paul?" she asked still holding onto me. The bed creaked underneath Rachel's weight, not that she had much weight anyway. Charlie smiled again and Rachel looked at me concerned. "Daddy, where's Jake? You didn't leave him home alone did you?" she whispered weakly.

I wanted to tell her Jake was with Paul but that would only raise questions for me that I had no right to answer. I pressed my lips to Rachel's forehead wanting her to relax a little. "No, princess, I lied. "Jake is just fine, he's with Embry. You remember Embry, don't you?"

Rachel smiled a little but she also seemed curious and skeptical about what I said. "Daddy," she muttered as her gaze darkened to meet mine with a no bullshit twinge to it. "Please don't lie to me I've been told enough of them to last me two lifetimes."

The door of the hospital room opened and saved me from making up yet another lie to cover up the last one I'd told Rachel. I let out a sigh of relief staring at the flowered wallpaper that made a border around the center of the walls. A tall slender brunette walked over to the bed looking very nervous. "Mr. Black, there is someone here to see Rachel; he says his name is Sam Uley."

I nodded silently watching Rachel grip the side of the bed and start thrashing around. The nurses came rushing in like a herd of wild animals after their prey. Then the doctors whispered "It's about to start again, we need to find this Paul guy and fast!"

A few minutes later Rachel let out an ear piercing scream that sent chills down my spine. "PAUL! I need MY PAUL!" she screamed undeniably frightened. "PAULY!" she screamed again making me realize just how badly she was hurt.

The doctors left the room a few minutes later, leaving Charlie and I at a loss for words as Rachel mumbled Paul's name like a broken record. Sam stepped in the room walking straight to Rachel's bedside lightly touching her hand. "Rachel, do you remember me?" he asked quietly searching her eyes.

Rachel turned her head to look at Sam with a sudden shyness. "Hi, Sam," she whispered softly. I hated the fear that coated her voice and I watched as she snatched her hand back to her side. Her actions told me without a shadow of a doubt she needed Paul more than anyone else at the moment. "Can you do me a favor, Sam?" she asked quietly as she stared blankly at the clock hanging on the wall in front of her.

Sam bowed his head a bit casting a dark glance at me as if I were a criminal on trial for an unspeakable crime. "I'd do anything you ask of me Rachel, you're like a kid sister to me," he muttered almost reluctantly. "What do you need?"

My eyes were fixated on Rachel as her body jolted around the bed, a sign she was about to start screaming for Paul any second. Just like clockwork the horrific screams made their way to my ears. "Rachel, it's okay baby, you're okay," I whispered desperate to make the screams stop.

Rachel looked at Sam again after she had calmed herself down. "Sam, I need you to do me a really huge favor right now," she breathed trying to sound as normal as she could, given her current state. "I want to go home to Paul, please Sam take me home to him."

Sam looked to me for answers but I couldn't give him any because Rachel started to scream again. Sam tried to calm her down but it was useless because the thrashing was too violent. "Billy, we have to bring her home," Sam said over the constant screams. "Paul's touch might help; he has always had that effect on her."

Paul did have a calming effect on Rachel, I had to admit that and ever since she was five years old that boy has made her eyes light up like a billon stars in the blackest of night skies. The light was gone from my baby girl's eyes now whatever Danny had done to her tonight was not the first time but it would be the last I'll be sure of that. I reached out to grab Rachel's hand just as my phone rang, which made her hand jerk away from me. I answered the phone seeing Jacob's name on the screen. I took a deep breath and put the phone to my ear to be greeted with agonizing howls. "Jacob, what is that noise?" I asked afraid I already knew the answer.

Jacob was quick with his answer and his tone told me that this was not a casual call to check on his sister. "Dad, that was Paul howling when you answered the phone," he told me in a rush. "He can tell something is wrong with Rachel and to be honest he's starting to scare me. Please, hurry home!"


	2. Chapter 2

_2: Seeing Red_

_PAUL POV_

_ I dug my massive paws into the dirt beneath them as Jacob was telling me about Rachel. My head was spinning, and my sharp teeth were bared at him. I didn't know how to handle this, I had a feeling that Rachel was hurt but I put it to my wanting her back home. Deep animalistic snarls greeted anything that Jacob had to tell me because in all honesty the reason Rachel left me was partly his fault._

The memory of the last night I saw Rachel filled my mind we fought, worse than we ever have before. I didn't want her to go to college in LA I wanted her to stay with me, but she thought I was trying to control her. I wasn't trying to control Rachel I'd never do that, but I imprinted on her and Jacob didn't like the idea. I was being an ass to Rachel that night; I told her that I never wanted to see her again. The very next day I found out she was going to UCLA for college. I'd give anything to hold her in my arms right now. I heard Jacob's voice breakthrough my thoughts using his alpha tone.

The alpha tone was something I hated. Sam and Jacob used it to get their way when one of the pack members was out of line. "Paul, I need you to calm down right now," he said digging at the dirt in front of me. "I don't know all of the details yet but Sam is up there now with her."

I saw red when Jacob told me that Sam was with Rachel. A feral growl ripped through my chest making my whole body vibrate with anger. "How can he see her and I can't?" I shot back at him not really caring if I was out of line. "Do I need to remind you who her wolf is? I asked as my jaw snapped clamping down on his shoulder. A loud whimper was all I got in response.

Jacob's head shot up from the ground throwing me into the air and making land four feet away from him. "Paul, I know you're angry but we need to think about Rachel right now. I'm just as scared as you are," he told me swallowing back the lump in his throat. "Hell I'm probably even more scared because this is bringing back the memories of losing Mom and I can't lose Rachel."

I watched as Jacob phased back pulling in shorts over his legs and looking down at the ground. I studied his eyes for a moment, the in them fear was unmistakable. I was mentally lecturing myself now how could I be such a dick to him? Rachel is his sister before she is my imprint. "Jake, I don't know why I attacked you. I'm just so scared right now that I don't know what else to do. Has your dad called yet?" I asked hoping to hear anything on Rachel's condition. Not knowing the situation at all was pissing me off and I started to wonder if Jacob was ever going to tell me the story.

Jacob's eyes were dark; like he had more anger in him then I ever had in my entire life. He sat on the ground watching me closely. I guess he thought I couldn't handle what he was about to say and wanted to make sure his eyes were on me at all times. A deep breath broke the silence between us before he spoke. "Paul, I don't know much about what happened to Rachel but I do know that that Dad and Charlie were on their way up there to see her," he muttered softly unable to look me in the eyes.

The ringing on my cell phone broke the long silence, glancing down at the cell phone screen I saw it was Sam. I didn't want to talk to him but something told me to pick up the phone. "Sam, what is it? Now is not a good time to harp on me about patrols," I bit out not really caring how heartless I sounded. I swallowed thickly trying to keep my temper in check so I didn't break yet another cell phone.

Sam's deep voice rang in my ears as he solemnly told me why he was calling. "Paul, I'm with Rachel, she needs you but I don't want you to leave Washington," he said quietly. His voice sounded off almost like he was afraid to speak. "Billy is checking her out of the hospital against medical advice, she's been beaten Paul almost beyond recognition. She needs you and only you so Billy is bringing her home," he told me as an ear piercing scream followed his voice.

I knew that scream anywhere it was Rachel, she sounded horrible as if something had just stabbed her in the stomach. A deep growl rumbled in my chest I was getting angry again and this time the only way to stop me from phasing was to let me speak to Rachel. "Sam, let me talk to her please," I pleaded as my voice cracked with emotion.

The line fell silent and I thought Sam had hung up on me. "I can't let you speak to her right now Paul. It's probably not the best thing for either of you at the moment," he told me brutally honestly. I hated that I hated that Sam had a choice when I didn't. "Paul I think you should wait to see her until after some of these injuries heal. It's pretty bad and I would hate to see you phase and hurt her because of how she looks right now," he said solemnly.

Another scream rang in my ears when I was about to answer Sam. "PAUL!" was all I heard her say before the nurses offered to sedate her, sedate my Rachel. Before anyone could tell me no I booked a flight to LA. "Daddy, I need Pauly," I heard her scream hoarsely. I hated hearing her like that I hated feeling helpless.

Choking back all the emotion I could stand even though it felt like I was suffocating on the air that I was trying to breathe, I made one request that Sam could not deny me of at any point. "Sam, I want you to give Billy the phone, I want it to be his choice whether I see Rachel right now or not," I said sternly with every bit of anger that I've bottled up in my chest for 2 1/2 years. "You've kept me away from Rachel long enough, you will not have a choice in this decision only her father will!"

"Paul, you will not speak to me like that, understand?" Sam said in a defiant tone. "I am your alpha; you will do as I say, not as Billy says." Sam tried to use the alpha tone on me again. I couldn't believe he had the balls to try that right now, my imprint was hurt and it was partly his fault.

Billy's voice was in the next thing I heard. "Sam, you will let me speak to Paul, if he wants to speak to me. You are not my alpha, remember that," he snapped snatching the phone from Sam's hand. "Paul, they can't get her to calm down and I want to fly home tonight. They won't put her in the life star helicopter this way," he told me as his was voice broke with emotion.

I knew what I had to do then; I had to go help him, no matter how much seeing Rachel hurt would kill me. "I'm on my way, Billy. Don't tell anyone that I'm coming; I'm breaking Sam's alpha order because if he thinks he can keep me away from Rachel again he's dead wrong."

A long sigh was all Billy had to offer me in response to my tone. "Paul, I just ask that you be careful, you're like a son to me now. You always have been," he told me as his voice grew week with tears. "Chelly needs you here more than anyone, even more than me." Chelly was a childhood nickname that Rachel's mom had given her and Billy still used.

Once I ended the phone call with Billy I ran home to pack a bag and catch my flight to LA. My mom was confused because I never go anywhere, it was already 12 AM and I'm packing a suitcase. "Mom, Rachel's been hurt. I need to go to LA and help Billy fly her home; I'll be back as soon as I can. I love you." Yes, I'm a mama's boy and everybody in the pack knows it which I hate with everything I am.

As soon as I got dropped off at the hospital I ran in the double doors not stopping at any desks. I was going to find Billy on my own I didn't need a nurse telling me that I wasn't family and I couldn't see Rachel. I had made it up to the intensive care waiting room when I saw Billy sitting in the corner clutching an untouched cup of coffee. "Billy, where's Rachel? Is she all right?" I asked frantically unable to stay still for more than thirty seconds.

Charlie placed a hand on my shoulder trying to stop my constant movement. His attempts failed however because I was just too worried about Rachel to care about anything else at the moment. "She's badly hurt, Paul she keeps screaming for you though," Billy told me in a rush. "It's pretty bad, I've never seen anyone hurt this bad except Sarah."

When Billy said he and never seen anything like this besides Rachel's mother I started to panic even more. I wanted to break through the double doors, scoop Rachel up in my arms and take her home but all I could do right now was sit and wait. I refused to talk to anyone because I didn't want to appear weak but I had never felt this way before, I was helpless. "She'll be all right Billy, she is a fighter," I tried to reassure him while failing to reassure myself.

A few minutes later a blond nurse walked into the waiting room glancing between Billy, Charlie and I. She looked as puzzled as possible when she approached me. "Are you Paul Damon by any chance?" she asked holding up a medical chart.

I took a deep breath and nodded my head my voice would not cooperate. She led me through the double doors and down a long corridor into a tiny room with a single bed. "Is this allowed?" I asked nervously looking around the room. "I don't want anyone to get fired or anything for me being here."

The nurse smiled and shook her head. "We normally don't allow anyone but immediate family back here but since you were the one she's been screaming for I thought it might help," she said softly trying not to wake Rachel up. "Are you two together?"

I chuckled a bit at her question she seemed so nervous to speak to me. "You could say that but technically no, we're just best friends," I lied. With a nod the nurse was gone and I made my way to the side of Rachel's bed. I touched her delicate hand that was black and blue sending shivers down my spine. "I'm sorry, Rach, this is my fault," I whispered fighting back my emotions.

A doctor entered the room a few minutes later lightly tapping me on my shoulder. I looked up to see a doctor that looked like the leech in Forks. "You are the young man she's been screaming for aren't you? She's quite a fighter but we had to give her sedation medication for a while because her body needs rest," he told me matter-of-factly. "My name is Dr. Paisley by the way."

I stood up from the rickety chair I'd been sitting in for the past hour and shook his hand. My heart was pounding in my chest I was afraid to ask questions because I didn't want to hear that I could lose the love of my life. "Thank you, will she be all right?" I asked with a strong fear that the answer was no. "What exactly happened?"

Dr. Paisley shook his head glancing down at the folder in his hand. "No one knows for sure, she just keeps screaming for you. We've tried to ask her numerous times what happened tonight but she won't talk about it," he said quietly. "It looks to me as if she was punched in the back with a fist, but that is all I can tell for sure."

My blood began to race, I hated this I hated the fact that Rachel been hurt so badly and I wasn't around to protect her. I sank back down in the chair holding my head in my hands. "When will she be awake?" I asked feeling my hands start to shake. "I can't believe this happened!"

Dr. Paisley looked at me worriedly glancing back up towards the head of the bed. "It will be a while, she was putting up a fight when we tried to sedate her," he muttered. "She was insistent upon going home tonight. Even when her father pleaded with her to cooperate with us, all she wanted was you."

I knew then that Rachel didn't really hate me although I wouldn't have blamed her if she did. I'd been a complete asshole to her when she wanted to leave La Push to go to UCLA. I'd give anything to take that moment back right now and stop her from leaving in the first place. "Well, that makes me feel a little better," I mumbled wishing he would just leave me alone.

With a simple nod Dr. Paisley left the room and I sat in the silence of just me and the beeping machines that sustained Rachel's life at the moment. I hated the noise I wanted to hear her laugh or hear her call me Pauly again. I knew that Jacob was scared but nothing compared to the fear I hid from everyone. After a few minutes I couldn't fight the emotion anymore I broke down and let the violent sobs I held deep in my chest out. "I'm sorry, Rachie, I'm so sorry I shouldn't have let you leave the reservation, I shouldn't have told you I never wanted to see you again," I sobbed violently as my chest ached because of the broken imprint bond.

I wasn't sure if the bond was truly broken or not but the ache in my chest got worse and worse over the two and half years that Rachel and I have been apart. I was mean to her so mean that I probably didn't deserve her now that's all I wanted. I'm not a man who shows emotions because I just don't. The only person who's ever seen me cry besides my mother was Rachel. I sat in the chair thinking about all the times Rachel has picked me up from the most disastrous times in my life. Then I started hating myself for not being there for her tonight when she needed me the most.

I must've cried myself to sleep at some point during the night but when I opened my eyes I was still in the same place as the night before. I was hoping that Rachel being hurt was some kind of horrible nightmare and I had just dreamt it all but of course I was wrong like always. There was a blonde nurse standing over by Rachel's head offering me a warm smile. "Good morning, you must be the infamous Paul she was screaming for last night," she said checking Rachel's vitals.

I nervously rubbed the back of my neck and looked up at her. "Yeah, I'm Paul, am I going to get in trouble for being here?" I asked hoping she would say no because I wasn't going anywhere without Rachel. "Is she going to wake up soon?"

The nurse smiled a little bit and extended her hand to meet mine. "I'm Danielle, nice to meet you and she has incredible taste in men," she said blushing slightly. "What a lucky girl she is to have a man like you around." She was eyeing me and I could tell she was trying to flirt but I had no interest in her or any other woman besides the one lying in the hospital bed. Before leaving the room Danielle turned to me with a grin a mile wide. "If for any reason it doesn't work out with you two, here's my number give me a call."

My inner wolf was at the surface now as I tried desperately to remain calm. I couldn't believe the nurse had the nerve to flirt with me while Rachel was lying there hurt. I started to pace the room when Billy wheeled in with Charlie behind him. "Morning, Paul, did you sleep okay?" he asked handing me a cup of coffee. "You should really sit down Paul, pacing won't make her wake up any faster."

Nothing would allow me to sit down because I was on the brink of phasing and I knew it. I clenched my teeth and balled my fists trying to control myself in the tiny room. "I know I should sit down, Billy but I can't right now it's nearly impossible," I sneered not meaning to take any of my frustrations out on him.

Billy shook his head and continued to watch me pace back and forth through the tiny room. Charlie watched in silence too but was completely unaware that I was even a werewolf. Charlie thought I was just Jake's best friend and Billy took me in after Mom's job got crazy. I was taking deep breaths squeezing my eyes shut as tightly as I could while my whole body started to shake violently. "Not now!" Billy said sternly backing his wheelchair into the corner of the room.

I couldn't help it my bottled up anger was boiling over and that meant that I was going to phase any minute. Charlie stared at me in shock and never said a word but I'm pretty sure he was horrified at the sight before him. "I can't control it, Billy I've tried all night!" I snapped letting my body crouch down into the position necessary for phasing.

The next thing I heard was like music to my ears and I instantly snapped to full attention. "PAUL! My Paul, where is he?" Rachel screamed unaware that I was at the foot of her bed crouched on the floor. "God dammit, daddy why are we still in this godforsaken hospital? I told you to bring me home to Paul, I want him here now!" Oh boy she hadn't lost her temper that's for sure!


	3. Chapter 3

_3: Nightmares and Broken Dreams_

RACHEL POV

I stared at my dad angrily waiting for a response; I stared at Charlie in the same way. I hated hospitals anyone who knew me to tell you that which is why a lot of people were surprised when I enrolled in medical school. "Dad I asked you a question why aren't you answering me?" I spat angrily. I wasn't sure why but I had a feeling someone was keeping something for me.

The temperature of the room made my blood run cold I was freezing not to mention aching all over. Dad continued to ignore my pleas for Paul incessantly so I started screaming for him again even though I knew he couldn't hear me. My voice was hoarse and my body ached everywhere imaginable but nothing hurt more than not having Paul there with me. My dad grabbed my hand holding it to the bed. "Rachel, stop this please it won't help you get any better!"

I wanted to smack someone but my whole body was in too much pain for that. Sobs of tears were all I could do to express myself at the moment. I hadn't seen Paul in two and a half years and I knew the reason that Danny attacked me was for the simple fact I was missing Paul. Dad left the room leaving me alone for a few minutes. I hated my loneliness and I started to cry again. I missed home and Jake but most of all, my mom. The pain from my injuries was almost too much for me to take I let out another scream. I felt someone touch my arm and I jerked it away quickly before I got injured even more. "Easy Rach, it's just me," a voice said with instantly soothed me.

My hand jerked in response because I knew that voice anywhere. I looked around the room frantically for Paul. I thought I'd imagined his touch and his voice but I hadn't, when I looked at the foot of my bed he stood there as still as a statue. Tears streamed down my face and my vision became blurred. "Pauly? You're here after everything that happened two years ago?" I asked panicking a little. My mind was racing with questions I had to ask him but he stayed unmoving and unresponsive so I knew then that I was dreaming.

I didn't want to wake up from this dream because I knew it was the only way I'd ever see Paul again. We got into a major fight before I moved out to LA I said things that I didn't mean and vice versa or so I hoped. Paul was everything to me but that night was horrible even worse than my attack in my case. I still remember everything he said word for word_. Rachel you're crazy to want to move away from me you know that? If that's what you really want then I can stop you but don't come crying back here when it blows up in your face later for whatever reason. One more thing, Rach if you leave me now I never want to see you again ever! Do you understand? _His words echoed in my mind like a broken record every day since that fight.

I'd give anything to see him again anything at all but one thing about Paul I knew that no one else seemed to realize he never went back on his word. If he said he never wanted to see me again he meant it and I wasn't about to ruin his life by doing exactly what he said I'd do. I rolled onto my side trying to get comfortable when a sharp pain ran up my spine. I heard the hospital room door creak open and someone walking toward me. I felt slender fingers run through my hair and the all-too-familiar sent of La Push filling my nose. I turned my head to see Sam Uley standing there beside my bed he was much taller than I remembered. He wiped a stray tear from my cheek with a warm smile across his face. "How are you feeling Rachel can I get you anything?" he asked quietly.

I carefully rolled back onto my back wincing at the pain I felt with every move I made. I tried to smile sweetly but it just wasn't working. "I just want to go home, Sam I want to be with Jacob. I want to go to my safety zone," I pleaded as the tears filled my eyes again.

Sam rubbed my shoulders gently and sat in the chair beside the bed. He looked so afraid and confused that it began to confuse me too. "I know you want to go home, Rachel trust me I do, but it's probably best if you stay here at least for now," he said making more and more angry at him. "Jake's fine trust me I'd never let anything happen to him under my watch."

What did Sam mean by under his watch? I hated how everything I was told just made me want to ask more questions. I wanted to hear my baby brother's voice and I wanted him to tell me that he was okay. Ever since mom died I've become Jake's guardian of sorts, Becca left us and got married to a Samoan surfer named Ian so I watched Jake and until I went to college. I sat up fighting the pain that radiated in every part of my body. "What are you talking about Sam? Is my brother all right?" I asked feeling more and more panicked by the second.

Sam shrugged his shoulders and chuckled complete with the infamous smirk. "Yes Rachel Jacob is fine he's a big boy now," he said laughing lightly. "He doesn't need his big sister around to protect him all the time. You made the choice to leave so don't be surprised if you don't get a warm welcome back home."

I was just about to answer him when dad stormed into the room with anger filling his face. I tried to stay calm as best as I could but the look in my dad's eyes scared the hell out of me. He rolled himself forward toward Sam and placed his hand on the end of my bed. "Samson Uley you don't tell my daughter that she will not be welcomed back home!" he screamed never looking away from Sam. "My son misses his older sister more than you can even understand. I never want to hear you say that Jake doesn't need her."

Tears flooded my eyes again at the thought of Jake not needing me anymore; he was only nine when Mom passed away. I knew he was older now but to me he'd always be the lost little kid running in my room after a nightmare and bribing him to keep his mouth shut about Paul being asleep in the bed next to me. I looked over at Daddy unable to stop my tears of pain and sadness from falling. "Will you at least call Jake and let me talk to him? Is there a rule against that too?" I snapped angrily glaring at Sam in the process. I knew there was something everyone in the room was hiding from me but I couldn't put my finger on it.

Daddy pushed my hair out of my face and spoke softly trying to calm my anger at him down a bit. "Chelly, I'm sorry you feel so angry right now, but were only trying to help," he whispered as his voice cracked with emotion. In all the times I've been around my dad I had only seen him cry once and that was when my mom passed away. Immediately guilt washed over me for snapping at him the way I had. He didn't deserve any of it, no one in the room did but I felt defenseless and alone without Paul.

Sam left the room for a few minutes and I was glad to be alone with Dad and Charlie for the first time in a few hours. Charlie's not by the bed stroking my hand lightly with his thumb. "Rachel, I know you're scared and in a lot of pain but I promise you your dad is trying to do what's best for you right now," he told me softly kissing my forehead. "You'll see Paul soon enough you just need some patience, sweetie."

I didn't have any more patience left I knew what I wanted and knew what I wanted but no one was willing to give him to me or even call him. I was losing all hope of even getting home again in one piece. Daddy was trying so hard to keep me calm but it just wasn't working my blood pressure had raised to a dangerous level I was probably minutes away from a stroke. "Charlie, go get him we can't have her get any worse," I heard daddy whisper as I drifted in and out of consciousness. "Charlie I mean it! Go get him now!"

I didn't remember passing out but apparently I had at some point. My head was pounding and the room lights were too bright for me to even open my eyes. I groaned lowly wishing all of my aches and pains would just disappear. Suddenly I heard the voice again calming me down I just didn't have the strength to open my eyes and see the guy who was talking to me. "Rachel, can you open your eyes for me?" he asked softly. "Please, Rach open your eyes, I need to see your beautiful eyes."

My eyes fluttered open as I squinted against the brightness of the lights in the room. My eyes began to water from irritation and I felt someone wipe away the tears that fell from them. I tried to speak but my voice was gone and my throat was killing me again. I heard my dad say something to Charlie about not recognizing someone but I was clueless as to who he was talking about until I heard the nickname I hadn't heard in two and half years. My Paul was in the room with me and I didn't have the strength to really move or speak. My voice sounded raspy to my own ears as I said what I've been waiting to say since the fight. "Paul, you're here? You're really here?" I asked weakly thinking that I was dreaming again. "I thought you never want to see me again I didn't mean for them to actually call you. I'm sorry if I interrupted your life, you probably have a wife and children to get back to," I mumbled looking away from him.

Paul's eyes looked like saucers and he nearly fell backwards at my confession, I had never seen him so scared before. His large hand rubbed my cheek gently so gently that I barely felt it. "Rachel I'm sorry that I said I never wanted to see you again," he whispered letting his voice crack. "That was the farthest thing from the truth."

I wanted to pull him close to me to hold him and take away his pain but I couldn't even bear to sit up for very long before a surge of pain raked through my body again. I lifted my hand to Paul's smiling just a little. "It's okay, it's over now you're here and that's all that matters," I muttered losing my voice again.

Paul sat in the chair beside my bed and watch in horror as the doctors and nurses administered different kinds of medication to ease my pain. I felt him squeeze my hand gently forgetting that I was even bruised there too. When I pulled my hand away biting back yet another scream Paul looked at me apologetically and started to leave the room. "Maybe I should just go back home until your injuries heal some," he said reluctantly. "All I seem to be doing right now is causing you more unnecessary pain."

My eyes darted across the room toward the door as I watched Paul walk out of it. All I can do then was cry because he thought he was causing me more pain when I was feeling better with him in the room. Daddy came in the room a few minutes later looking at me like I had six heads. "Rachel, what is it?" he asked worriedly as Charlie brought him a cup of coffee and a blueberry muffin from the cafeteria downstairs. "Did the nurses say something to upset you?"

I shook my head repeatedly choking back even more tears that were caught in my throat. "No, Daddy Paul just thinks he's causing me more pain by being here," I said brokenly through my tears. "He says that maybe you should be around me after my injuries heal because right now all he seems to be doing is causing more pain. That's not true Daddy you have to tell him that's not true! Please don't let him leave again I won't survive it this time."

Charlie raced out of my room and down the hall in search of Paul. My body began to shake with fear when my doctor touched my leg. I screamed in horror as if he was Danny, I didn't want anyone touching me especially not a man. The only man I'd let touched me since the attack was Paul and I didn't understand why. Dad reached for my hand but a yanked it away not allowing him to grab it. "Rachel I won't hurt you sweetie," he whispered trying to reach for my hand again. "Chelly, it's me Princess your daddy, I'd never hurt you."

I wanted more than anything to believe what Daddy was saying but I couldn't my fear was immobilizing me. I screamed in horror as the nurses injected more medication into my arms and doctors prodded at the bruising on my legs and back. "I want to go home!" I screamed as loud as possible hoping my dad would get the hint. I didn't want to be in LA anymore where Danny could possibly find me to finish what he has started a few days before. "Please just take me home."

A few minutes later Charlie came back in the room with Paul behind him. Paul's eyes looked red and irritated I could tell he'd been crying. Charlie nodded at me silently and smiled before leaving the room again. I wondered why Charlie would never stay for very long but then again my screams of pain and tears probably didn't help the situation. Paul stood at the foot of my bed staring at Dad with such anger in his eyes. "If she wants to go home, Billy then we should take her," he said through gritted teeth. "It's where she belongs in the first place. These doctors don't know a fucking thing about her and you want to entrust her life with them?"

I knew Paul had a temper but I didn't think he'd ever yell at my father that way. I just sat there in the bed praying that my dad didn't test Paul. I wanted to get up and move around the room but I could barely blink without pain. As much is I wanted to go home right now I didn't know if my body could handle a long flight. I was just about to say something to Paul before another bout of pain ran through my body and everything went black.

When I opened my eyes again I wasn't sure where I was at first. The room was so dark that I couldn't even make out shadows on the wall. I heard footsteps coming towards me and I started to panic until lengthy fingers interlocked with mine. "You're okay Rach," Paul whispered in my ear instantly calming me down. "You've been unconscious for a few days now but we flew home like you asked us to. How are you feeling? Do you need anything?"

I never moved my fingers from Paul's because it was comforting to me to know that even the worst moment in my life he was there. I shook my head slowly as he turned on the bedside light. "Where am I? Where's Jake?" I asked suddenly panicked for my brother. "I'm sore, really sore did something else happen while I was unconscious?"

Paul chuckled and flashed me his famous smirk. "Rachel you are the only girl I know that is recovering from a life-threatening injury and is more concerned about her baby brother than herself," he said walking toward the door. "I'll go get Jake stay here."

Where did Paul think I was going to go? My whole body ached and I had no idea where I was in La Push. "Pauly," I whined just to get on his nerves. "Where would I go? I doubt I could walk out of here with the amount of pain I'm in."

Paul rolled his eyes and walked into the hallway. "Nothing could stop you, Rach if you really wanted to leave," he said frowning a bit. "You've never listened to anyone in your life so why start now? Hopefully with you being home again your nightmares will go away."

I shook my head and laughed a little because Paul hadn't changed that much. "I doubt my nightmares will go away for a very long time, Pauly," I said sitting up in the bed. "They've been haunting me for days so I don't expect anything different even with being home. Nice try though, I appreciate it more than you could ever know."

Paul smiled and walked back over to kiss my head lightly. "I'd do anything for you, Rach I hope you know that," he muttered looking into my eyes before walking back toward the door. I didn't know what to say to him but before I had a chance he said something that shocked me. "Rach, I'm glad you're home I've missed you."

My heart began to race at the idea of Paul missing me. After the fight we had I didn't think he'd ever miss me again. I wasn't sure what to say to him so I'd smiled a little preserving my voice a few minutes longer. "I've missed you too, Paul. So, don't you have a wife to get back to?" I asked praying he said no.

Laughter filled my ears and Paul rolled his eyes once more. "Sure I have a wife to get to, but I'm already with her," he grinned complete with a wink. "I'll only ever have eyes for you, Rachel Danielle Black."


End file.
